Monday, February 7, 2011

Both Ghastly And Dire

Rolling Stone, the arbiter of All Things Cool, dug deep into their collective pocket thesaurus to describe the Super Bowl halftime show. The result, while expected, not pretty. Ghastly, dire, nightmarish trip off the pages. They do stop for a moment to deliver an actual review:

Alas, the one and only Fergie proved she’s not Axl, because their version of GNR’s “Sweet Child O’Mine” was a nightmare, all bitchslap rapping and cocaine tongue getting nothing done. Even Usher looked embarrassed.

Why Couldn't You Guys Have Just Gotten Stuck Up There?

The Super Bowl wasn't a total loss, entertainment-wise, at least not from my perspective. Jerry Jones in his vainglorius attempt to set a Super Bowl attendance record forgot to consult the fire marshal before setting up a few hundred temporary seats (at $900 a pop). Oops. Out you go with the other tv watchers.

Even better, even with Jerry's fake attendance boosting attempts he failed to set the record. Hell, he didn't even have the best attended event at Jerry Bowl.

Between the Peas, the abomination called Christina Aguilera's anthem, ice shooting off the stadium and crushing bystanders on top of the Cowboys' annual in-season meltdown, the game was a huge success. I doubt that Jones' ego has shrunk enough to fit into the shrine he built, but maybe it can fit into Texas now.


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